Lenny's Meditations, May 22, 2001
Just like God is a trinity, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, so, we are a trinity: body, soul and spirit. Many things in the Old Testament, are a shadow of things to come (Heb. 10:1). One of these types and shadows is the Tabernacle, which is made up of the outer court, the holy place and the holy of holies. These three match our trinity: the outer court is for the flesh; the holy place is for the soul; and the holy of holies is for the spirit. What I see is that in the outer court, you have the animal man, the raw sinner, the one that has just come out of being dead in trespasses and sins (Eph. 2:1). He sacrifices. He gives up things: lying and cheating and stealing and cursing and lusting and so forth. He sacrifices these fleshly things and then gradually, when he matures spiritually, God takes him into the holy place, the place of the soul, where you have man's self efforts mixed together with God's effort. In this place, God is showing us that He is involved in our life, but we have not matured enough spiritually to give up our own efforts. So, there is a mixture of what God does, and what we do with our own works. Gradually, God moves us toward the veil that is between the holy place and the holy of holies. Here, we realize that the closer we get to the veil, the more we see that self effort is nothing at all before God. God does not need our self efforts, our works. We love God enough in this place and come to trust Him, as He reveals to us that self effort is NOT to the glory of God, but to the glory of man. In this place, God wants to strip off all the self effort so that only the spirit within us, which has been birthed out of God, can step into the holy of holies.
As we get closer to the veil between the holy place and the holy of holies, a blast of God's glory comes through the veil and hits us. We fall down and the first thing we say is, "Woe is me with unclean lips" (Is. 6:5). Woe is me with all these self efforts that I am striving with. We see that in the light of His glory, our best works, our finest efforts are just filthy rags (Is. 64:6), or as Paul the Apostle put it after he had been in the third heaven, "It is all dung compared to God" (Phil. 3:8). God's glory, God's power, God's majesty, God's light shines forth in this blast that comes out of the holy of holies and we realize that we have nothing to offer to God whatsoever. Because of the blast, we back off. We stay in the holy place and then gradually, we hunger again for the true Spirit of God, for all that God has for us. We inch ourselves closer to the veil again and another blast comes. We experience the same thing. Finally, we say, "God, no matter what it takes, I need to be in the holy of holies. I need to be just with you and nothing else attached to it whatsoever." The minute we say that, the two edged sword falls on us, and just like Heb. 4:7, "The word of God is sharper than any two edged sword, cutting asunder soul and spirit." This is what happens; we experience a cutting asunder of soul and spirit. Everything that is flesh, every self effort that is soulish is separated from our spirit, which is the true us. We are spirit and everything else that is attached to us is strictly a house, a temporary dwelling that we are living in. This "tent" we live in (II Cor. 5:1) is not us because we see that we are spirit, made in the image and likeness of God (Gen. 1:26-27), and God is spirit (Jn. 4:24). We have been burst forth out of God in the new birth as spirit, and now, we are willing to separate from the flesh and the soul so that we become strictly spirit. At this point, we are allowed to step through the veil and into the holy of holies.
When you see clearly the separation of soul and spirit in your life, you recognize that all the soulish things are only self efforts and they are just like filthy rags, just like dung compared to the pure efforts of God, the pure power of God. There is no comparison. You start abhorring them; you don't want any part of them. You yearn for God to do what He wants to do through you. Your desires are only God driven. The pure life of God, the pure light of God, the pure love of God, the pure mercy of God, the pure kindness of God, there is nothing else for you but that. You want to hold on to it. You don't want anything else to operate in and through you. It is so pure and so holy and so wonderful when it takes place. You do see that you operate in your self efforts and at the same time, you yearn for God to flow through you, pure and clean. Gradually, the self efforts fade away, more and more and more, and God steps in, more and more and more. You see that the Adamic part of you, the carnal nature, the flesh, is just self effort. That's all it is, like filthy rags, but you also see at the same time, as it emerges, that your spirit is a life giving spirit. Because Christ is a life giving Spirit, you are a life giving spirit. You begin to flow in that knowledge and that revelation that you are a life giving spirit and this is the part that you have been yearning to express to others. You want to set them free with this pure life, with this pure love, with this pure light. You recognize that you can only be what God is, that is the true you. What God is, you are, because you have been birthed forth out of Him. You are part of Him. You know and you see that in Him is all the fullness of everything (Col. 2:9), and this is what you are expressing in your life more and more and more.
There is no more fear in your life that people are going to criticize your self efforts, because those self efforts are not important any more. Only God and what God is in and through you means anything at all from now on. He is holy; so you are holy. He is pure; so you are pure. You can only be what He is. You know that He is going to manifest what He is in and through you. You just have to have the patience to wait for Him to do what He wants to do. It is no more what you are doing, but what He is doing in and through you to glorify Himself (Eph. 4:6). You see that you are no more that Adamic nature, the living soul, but you are that life giving spirit.
We have been birthed forth from you, Father and it is your very life that you have breathed into us.
Jan and Lenny Antonsson
17178 Highway 59, Neosho, MO 64850 (Snail Mail)
"The Two Covenants, Behind The Veil"
"The Seed of God," by Lenny
The Glory Road
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This page was edited and uploaded to the web
by Jan Antonsson, on 5/30/01
and last edited on 11/03/08.